Welcome to my new series, Conversations — a space where I’ll be sharing inspiring, real-life stories from incredible women.

For our first conversation, I spoke with my good friend, Kerri Whitney, a solo mum who embraced the journey of IVF to build the family she dreamed of.

From balancing the joys and challenges of motherhood to finding her stride in self-care and rediscovering her passions, Kerri shares what life is really like as a single mum.

Read on for a look into her world, her values, and her advice for others considering this path.

on her journey to becoming a mum…

My journey to wanting a family of my own started with an unexpected vision, you could say.

Before kids, my life was all about full-time work and intense training for triathlons.

I loved it and did it for years.

Back then, I was happy and didn’t have the urge for children.

After a long-term relationship and a few dates here and there, I decided to focus solely on training.

But on a solo car trip to a race, I had this vision of two little kids in the backseat, heading off on a family adventure.

I couldn’t shake it.

I still wasn’t interested in a relationship, but I knew I wanted kids of my own.

Just me and my babies.

And that’s how my IVF journey began.

Thankfully, it wasn’t too long before I became pregnant with my first child.

on being a solo mum …

Becoming a solo mum, I’d often get comments like, “I don’t know how you do it.”

But to us, this is just our normal — mum does everything (with some help from the boys on small tasks, too!).

Honestly, all mothers and parents are amazing, with or without a partner.

We’re all trying our best.

I sometimes joke that I’m glad I don’t have another adult to look after as well. That would be even harder! Ha!

on her typical day-to-day …

Now that my kids have started school and kindergarten, our days have a bit more structure and routine.

Before school, we’d be out and about most days, having “adventures” — even if it was just a walk to the park for a picnic lunch.

Our mornings now are spent together over breakfast, where we color, draw, and play a few games before getting dressed and heading off to school.

On non-kindergarten days, my youngest, Sammy, and I might spend the day helping my mum with her garden, playing at the park, or baking until it’s time for school pick-up.

Then it’s back home for dinner, playtime, bath, and bed.

The days go by so quickly.

Once the boys are in bed, I get a little quiet time to myself to watch a show, do some meal prep, or read before turning in.

on the unexpected challenges …

The biggest hurdle as a solo mum is when I’m sick or when my youngest, who has virus-induced asthma, falls ill.

We’ve had plenty of late nights in emergency care.

Many times, I’ve had to call an ambulance and figure out who can look after my eldest, Blake.

Fortunately, my mum and sister live nearby, so he stays with them.

There’s also some guilt around my dog, Frankie.

When the boys were babies, I couldn’t take her for long walks every day like before or give her as much attention.

She still came along for pram walks, though, and she’s very loved.

Now that the boys are at school, Frankie and I go out for proper walks again.

on self-care …

When my boys were really young, I didn’t think much about self-care — I was just happy to be with them.

I’d squeeze in a workout here and there, but if someone got sick, I’d end up on the couch, taking care of them.

I learned to let go of the pressure to “do it all.”

I didn’t feel the need to arrange childcare just to do something solo.

Now that they’re older and more independent, I’m rediscovering my hobbies.

I’ve even developed a green thumb, and I’m reading more than ever before.

Plus, I’m getting back to regular workouts to keep both my body and mind strong.

on kindness, courage and learning …

Like most parents, I want to instil kindness in my boys.

I hope they’ll always love learning, keep asking questions, and have the courage to go after what they want in life.

on what she’d tell herself at the beginning of her journey …

Looking back, I’d tell myself, “You made the best decision — our little family just works.”

And I’d remind myself to slow down and savor every moment, because I’d love to hold those tiny baby hands again.

on what she loves most about being a mum …

The best part is watching them grow into little versions of me — not so much in looks, but in the way they pick up on everything I do.

They’re little sponges, always listening and learning.

You get to teach them everything you know, and the things you don’t, you get to learn together.

I tell them (probably too many times!) about my races, and now they’re dreaming of their own medals.

And, probably the best thing is that I get to cuddle these little beautiful babies and tell them I love them.

Kids really do give the best cuddles, and I hope I’ve encouraged them to keep that going well into their teenage years.

on her advice to others …

Some say you lose your identity or freedom when you have kids, but I don’t see it that way.

You don’t lose yourself — you just gain a new chapter.

Here’s to my school mum chapter!

Margaret Mielczarek

editor, journalist, digital content creator with a background in nutrition & dietetics.