oh my gosia

It’s funny how waking up at 5:30AM was once the most normal thing to do and how well-rested I felt by that time of the morning.

In fact, I used to wake up at around 4AM when living in Brisbane, the routine going something like: Wake/read/journal/coffee/run/work.

Fast-forward to now, Little Miss A is just over 3 months old and waking up to my little penguin – arms flapping in her sleep sack (the cutest alarm clock ever!) – for the 5:30AM feed requires every ounce of willpower and motivation to drag myself out of bed and commence the change/boob/top up/burp/back to bed routine.

I mentioned this to J this morning and he reminded me: “Well, back then you got a solid, uninterrupted 7-8 hours sleep each night.”

He has a point.

I saw a meme the other day, which described new-parent sleep in blinks.

You go to bed after a change/feed session, close your eyes to get some sleep and BLINK you’re up again!

It made me LOL. So funny because it’s painfully true.

When other parents said to us, ‘Get as much sleep before baby arrives’, they weren’t kidding.

The lack of sleep (and the exhaustion that comes with it) when baby arrives is no joke!

And while I really can’t complain about Little Miss A – she’s actually a very good sleeper, especially now that we’ve got our routine a little more sorted and she’s going to bed with a full belly (hence the formula top ups, which are additional to breastfeeding and the breastmilk she’s getting) – I have seen some absolute horror stories by parents STRU-GGLING with their baby’s sleep … or lack thereof.

It honestly sends shivers down my spine reading some of the stories in some of the mums & bubs forums I’m part of on Facebook.

the 4-month PRO-gression  

It seems just when we have things a little more sorted with our routine and now that Little Miss A is sleeping longer throughout the night, there’s a new change just around the corner … lurking in the dark shadows, ready to pounce.

The so-called ‘4-month sleep regression’.

Or as I prefer to refer to it, progression. Afterall, she’s not exactly going backwards in her development. This is all part of sleep maturation.

Similarly to when other parents advised warned us about getting ‘as much sleep as you can before baby arrives’, they’ve now started warning about the 4-month sleep regression.

And as much as I’d love to hide my head under my pillow and be all like, ‘Meh, it won’t happen to us!’, sleep regression is a real thing (Welp! Goodbye extra sleep) and all part of baby’s development.

So, what exactly is this dreaded 4-month sleep phenomenon?

According to the Sleep Foundation, the 4-month sleep regression is a change in the baby’s sleep pattern as she grows and develops.  

“At around 4 months, a baby’s brain and body are developing rapidly, and the process of forming and linking different areas of the brain and nervous system may create instability in sleep, referred to as sleep regression,” writes the Sleep Foundation.

The Sleep Foundation goes on to explain that sleep regression often occurs around the 4-month mark as this is typically the time when babies are going through “a major transition away from newborn sleep patterns”.

And, surprise, surprise, this transition isn’t always a smooth one – although, this apparently varies from baby to baby … much like with everything else!   

“Not all babies have a 4-moth sleep regression. Research has shown there is a considerable amount of individual variation in infant sleep” states the Sleep Foundation.

OK so, some babies find it tough, and sleep goes backwards, but others apparently experience a smoother transition through this period… Dear God, PLEASE let that be us!

signs to look out for

According to the Sleep Foundation, signs to look out for when it comes to the dreaded 4-moth sleep regression, include:

• Difficulty falling asleep. (Best build up that lullaby repertoire!)
• Waking up more frequently again throughout the night. (Back to the land of the sleep blinks!)
• Being extra cranky upon waking. (Who? Baby or parents? *Kidding!)
• Less hours sleeping overall, which may also impact feed schedules/routines.

ok, so how do we get through this period?

Reassuringly the Sleep Foundation says that the sleep regression should only last a few days to a few weeks, but to help parents and babies get through it in one piece they recommend the following:

And happy days! We’re already doing most of these, so it seems like we just keep on carrying on … and hope Little Miss A is one of the smooth sleep transitioners.

1. Routine is king! I never really understood just how important a baby’s sleep schedule/routine actually is until we had Little Miss A. The Sleep Foundation recommends “establishing distinct routines” early between night and day. This is something we did very early on, making sure Little Miss A was exposed to natural light during the daytime, while making sure her room was dark at sleep/nighttime.
2. Wind down with cuddling or rocking, soothe in crib and ensure baby falls asleep in her own bed. According to the Sleep Foundation, it’s also important to make sure baby falls asleep in her own bed as this can help baby associate bed with sleeping and help with self-soothing to go back to sleep when she wakes during the night. So, I normally cuddle Little Miss A until she’s just fallen into a deeper sleep, gently rocking her while singing lullabies etc., (it’s important for bonding with babt as well!) and then I’ll normally put her down into her cot and stay close by for a few moments, often with one hand gently on her chest and one on her head for extra touch/comfort until she’s in deep sleep.
3. Feed before bed. There’s nothing better than dozing off on the couch after a big meal. Amirite! Well, babies, it seems, are no different – they sleep better with full bellies! (We found that out very quickly, early on with Little Miss A!). The Sleep Foundation suggests feeding baby just before bedtime to help baby stay asleep longer between nighttime feeds. This is something we’ve been doing, and it really does work, especially feeding in a calm, quiet, bedtime environment.
4. Stick to safe sleeping guidelines. It should go without saying that, like every other night, parents must adhere to safe sleeping guidelines during this time to reduce the risk of sudden infant death syndrome (SIDS). The Sleep Foundation recommends risk reduction techniques, including removing soft toys from baby’s sleep space and having baby sleep on her back. The NHS also recommends baby sleep in the same room as you for the first 6 months. This is something we’ve been doing – I’m currently sleeping in the same room as Little Miss A to make sure I’m there to monitor her throughout the night and so I’m there if/when she awakens. The NHS also says baby’s head should be uncovered during sleep, with any “blankets tucked in and no higher than their shoulders”. We’re using a sleep sack now that Little Miss A is a little older, less risky compared to baby blankets. It’s also important to make sure baby isn’t too warm or too cold – “overheating can increase the risk of SIDS”. I recently came across a saying, ‘A cold baby cries, a hot baby dies’. A little morbid but it gets the important point across.  
5. Stick to a swift middle-of-the-night routine. The Sleep Foundation recommends that if when baby wakes up during the night, it’s a good idea to change nappies/feed/burp etc., as quickly and gently as possible, while keeping the room quiet and dark (or in our case, we have a side lamp on, which lets out a warm, gentle glow that baby is used to), to allow baby to get back to sleep quickly. “As soon as they’re fed, avoid playing with them or stimulating them and put them back to bed to return to sleep.” J and I have established a pretty efficient middle-of-the-night routine as, let’s face it, we all want to get back to sleep as quickly as possible, So, normally, J will change baby’s diaper, I’ll breastfeed, top up and pump if needed, J will do the burp and then it’s off to bed. That’s worked well for us so far and has meant we all get back to bed and sweet, sweet sleep as fast as possible.  

So, basically, in anticipating the ‘4-month regression’, we keep doing what we’ve been doing so far – most importantly stay consistent with routine! – and we will hopefully get through this transition period without too many missed zzz’s (stay tuned for that update 🙂 ).

And all this while keeping in mind that this is all just a normal part of a baby’s development.

Less a regression and more a progression towards more mature (and longer!) sleep.

Remember: “Sleep regressions are a common and natural part of infant development, and usually have no singular cause […] A 4-month sleep regression may not be entirely preventable, establishing healthy sleep habits can improve your baby’s overall sleep.” (Sleep Foundation)

Here’s to a good night’s sleep … eventually!

x G.

Margaret Mielczarek

editor, journalist, digital content creator with a background in nutrition & dietetics.